Bad Dad?

Well, today my husband calls me and says he can't take our daughter for the weekend, because he has a lot of other stuff to do, but that he will take her Sunday. One day out of the week you can spend with your kid that's garbage. I went and filed for child support today and as you imagine he wasn't really impressed and he called me a heartless monster. Is it true??? How did we end up here. I told him if we could figure it out then I would drop my petetion. What to do?

On my terms, I think??

I told my husband today that i can't keep doing this, so we are going to talk this weekend and see how it goes, but I don't know what to say...... Nothing has helped so far it is probably time to just let it go, but I don't have it in me to walk away from our marriage and our childs family.

How can someone change so much

My husband was such a sweet guy when I married him and I loved him so much. How do you just let the past go? We were really doing ok until I found out he is still hanging out with that girl even if it is with other people. Everyone knows how much that skank likes him, but even though he is hurting me he is still hanging out with her. My husband never would have done that. Then I call him to tell him that it also bothers me that he goes places with her and hangs out at his buddies house with her. Also, that instead of taking his space and thinking about stuff he is just hanging out with people. That's not fair when I am sitting here waiting for him and I am done. I just can't wait anymore. It's so hard to give up all the love I had for him and pretend the past three and a half years of good times never happened. But I can't handle the person he is know always yelling and cussing at me when I am telling him how I am feelings, since when he decided this he never thought about my feelings. I am having such a hard time giving it up, but I can't cry all the time anymore and I have to get past this because every time I look at the baby and see her looking at the door for her father I cry and I can't keep it up. I love my hhusband, but who ever this guy is is a jerk and I can't pretend anymore that we can go back and I won't go forward with this guy. If the old husband comes back then I would try, but I can't keep trying with this one.

Feeling Better

My husband and I had a talk today and after deliberation we decided that he will continue staying at a friends house and I will move back to our house and after he finishes working on him we will try dating again. Today I really felt like we would be ok we were playing around and goofing off and having a really good time like we used to. It was great, I didn't realize that we had been missing that maybe for a long time. I really think that this will be a good thing for us and he loves me, there's no other girl and he misses me. We will be fine. He even gets jealous about other guys and we both decided not to see other people. I feel awesome.

Another Hard Thing

We got along really well again yesterday. Until he told me he loved me, and he wants to always be friends. I told him I can't I have loved him to much to just all of a sudden be just friends. I asked him not to call me anymore unless it was about our daughter. I miss him and I hope everytime a door opens or the phone rings he changed his mind and wants to fix it, but not yet and I know that I am being pathetic, but I just miss him, so much. I am going to keep my hope to myself for a little while longer and I will keep praying everynight and maybe.

Dead Hope

I took our daughter over to see her father for a little while. We were talking and everything went really well and for a minute I thought there was a glimmer of hope that all of this could be fixed, I was wrong. I left from there and went to the store and brought him back some chicken, I was standing there with him and I said I want to fix it. He said he wanted us to be friends, but we could never be anymore because of everything that happened and that was when I really felt it the very last little ray of hope that had helped me through all of this die. We will always be bound together by our little ball of sunshine and by the love we had, but we will never be together again.

No suprises

My husband and I got in another fight yesterday. He brought that girl into my house again and to top it off he drove her to my house in my car. So even though I had been the one to leave, I told him I was coming home and he would have to get his stuff out of the house. I also told him I wanted my car back. Then we got in another fight, because I work nights and I told him he would have to stay with the baby on Thursday night when I was at work and also he could only have the baby on the weekends if he would stay at the house and I would leave, because I can't trust him not have our daughter around that slut and I will not know where he is with my baby or what he is doing. I am not putting her or myself through it I am done letting him make me feel bad. He is the one that is wrong here, not me. Today I am going to Friend of the Court and filing for child support and to shut out the joint bank account. It is officially over!! I will get through this. I do not need a jerk like that!!!

His Mom

I stopped back by my house last night at about 9:15 or so to let my dog outwith my mom since we were going to get ice cream because he is not very responsible anymore. As we pulled up to the curb his mother was out there mowing our lawn since he could not be bothered, but he has told me he will be moving out since I have turned everyone in his family against him, that is not true he has done this to himself. I just wonder how you go from seeing the father of your beautiful child and the love of your life to just not talking anymore. Apparently it is easy for him since he told me he hated me yesterday. I wish someone could tell me how to get over it, because I am stupid and I know it, because even if he called now and apologized I would go back even after how he hurt me because I just want our family back together.

The End

Well I went by my house on Sunday morning to get something that I had forgotten. On my way in the house my neighbor asked me who the girl my husband was kissing on my front porch was. It was the homeless girl that he worked with Rita who is 19 and a wiccan and is in this group that fights people with foam. What a loser, but what makes her such a slut is that she knew he was married with a seven month old baby. Everybody is telling me all the different things and i don't know who to believe and he swears up and down that it is not true and everybody else is telling me that he went out with her when we were fighting and I don;t know who to believe but fact is she stayed the night at my house Saturday night with him. I think that their is no hope for us anymore.

in my dreams

In my dreams I see my husband coming by telling me that he wants me to come home and that he is ready to work on it because he knows that we make the best family. Then he explains to me what happened and we promise to work on it and everything goes back to normal. We live together again and even though times are still sometimes hard and we still sometimes argue he sits down and talks to me about it instead of getting all worked up about it and hurting me.

I just feel like part of loving somebody is to work through all your problems and communicating with them instead of holding it all inside until you leave them. Then ignoring how they feel as they sit and cry and making them feel horrible and not trying to talk to them and fix it just sitting there and not saying anything.

A long night

Thursday night on my way home from work I decided to stop by the house and let our dog out to go potty. When I get there at after 11 my husband is not home. I immediatley look to see if the normal stuff he needs to stay the night at someone's house is there. It is all there even his cell phone charger and since his cell is attached at his hip that is very strange. So I call some of his friends and nobody has seen him he won't answers anyone's call and I am very concerned because as we all know I totally still love him. So he texts me at after 6a.m to let me know he is o.k. after I am up most the night worrying about him. Friday afternoon I decided to go up to his work for his break just to let him know that my sister bought a car, I talked to one of our old friends and that I really do miss him and I really wanted a hug. It has been very hard for me to go from seeing someone everyday and being the mother of their child to never seeing or even talking to him and I swear it doesn't seem to even be affecting him in the least. And you can't even imagine how much that hurts. But when I get there I think we can be civil and that maybe he would be glad to see me because he misses me, too. No not really he calls me as I am sitting in the parking lot and he says what do you think you're doing and I explained to him that I just wanted to tell him those few things and get a hug and he ended up yelling at me about how I am not giving him any space and stuff. So I will not talk to him again until Sunday, but when I was calling his friends last night one of them told me that he plans on going mudding on saturday and if he does that then we will talk because our daughter misses him so much and if he is planning on dropping her off at his moms and not even seeing her for the full two days he has her then that would be horrible. Every time the door open she looks up and you can just tell that she is waiting for him. Then to top all that off since this has happened on Wendsday he has not even called once to see how she is. As sad and as pitiful as I feel the only thing I want is to go home and be part of my family again.

The day after my family fell apart

I texted my husband at work to tell him that I did want to talk to him today and he said not to f*ckin bother him at work and he still mad at me and not to talk to him until Sunday. So I went to our house to let the dog out to potty and to feed and water the animals and his grandma that we live with was outside. Usually every morning she comes up to see the baby and she asked me where the baby was and I told her that we had moved back to my moms but that we would be moving back on Sunday and that maybe he would be moving out. And she said if I wanted to move back in I could. She was so nice, but I couldn't stop crying as I told everything (but the physical fight) that was going on.
I just wonder what I did or what happened that would push him to tear our happy family apart. All I have even wanted from him is to know so we could work on it, I don't want our baby to grow up in a broken home and I just love him so much that I couldn't eat. I still just feel absolutely blindsided and like I am in some terrible nightmare all the time. I am just going to give him his space for know but it is hard, because our daughter looks just like him and every time I look at her I see him and I remember how it used to be or how I thought it was. It is my only wish in this world that he would come to his senses and see how great his family is and come home to us. I just worry that he wants to see other people and even when I asked him if he wanted to fix this he said he wasn't sure. How can you do that to someone you claim to love and have a child with???? Who is this monster that took over my husbands body and where is the sweet man I love, if you see him could you tell him to come back to his wife and daughter who miss him very much, Please?

The day my family fell apart

Then on Wendsday morning at 9:20a.m. I texted him because he usually calls me on his 9 a.m. break just to see what was up and he replied to my text with a text that he thought we needed to take a break. What?! Was my text back. And so we met up out by his work to talk and I gave him back my ring and my car, but I felt like my heart was being ripped out. I love this man with all my heart. He is my soul. Then he makes even worse by saying he is depressed and he has been for like a month and a half now and he was just pretending everything was o.k. So I gathered up some of my stuff, because he told me not to take it all. My father went over and got my daughters crib and clothing. Then he wouldn't even talk to me and explain what was making this all happen. Later that night after my daughter couldn't sleep since she was in a new place and I couldn't sleep I went over there to get my pillows and I saw him sleeping there all peacefully and I thought I was going to kill him. So I woke him up to tell him that he was the one who needed the space and the baby was upset that we were moving home on Sunday and if he wanted to leave he could, but I wished he would stay and he kept blowing me off and then he got up and tried to leave, so I took almost all the keys and outside we went all I wanted to know was why all of a sudden he wanted to rip our little family apart. And he kept trying to get past me to the car and he let my cat out so we needed to catch him and he threw the keys at me and they fell on the ground. Then he gave up trying to catch my cat and tried to push past me to get the keys and I was trying to push him back and hit him and he threw me on the ground and left me there crying. I ran to my car a minute later and followed him we had many heated arguments on the phone. I finally called him and told him I was going home to find my cat and then I would leave. So we caught my cat together and then we talked some and at first he said he was going to talk to me on Thursday and I said no. And I cried for like an hour and a half, because my cat and dog were with me and I felt like I wouldn't get to see them and they are all part of our family. The only thing I wanted to do was save my marriage and then I came back to my moms and went to bed.

leading up to...

My husband and I were suposed to go on vacation up north, but our finances wouldn't allow for the gas and we already had memorial weekend off so we decided to just stay around home. On Saturday my parents said they would watch the baby all night and I was going to go out with some friends and he decided to go out mudding and drinking with his friends and he would return home on Sunday. My plans fell through, so I just kept the baby. I tried to get ahold of him on Sunday to see when he would be home and he didn't answer my calls, so after trying for about an hour (he always answers his phone for me) I was worried and I called his friend who said he already left and that his phone was messing up and so when he got home we dried it out(he got water in it from mudding) and it worked fine. We got in an argument about him not letting me know about the phone and worrying me.
On Monday we were talking and his friend called and said he was going to a derbyand so of course my husband wanted to go and I got upset because he was already leaving the next day to pick up a car they were buying and I felt like he should spend one day out of our vacation together with our baby and then he dropped the bomb on me that he was not sure if he wanted to go to school anymore. So that led to an argument and he left at one in the afternoon and didn't return home until after ten o'clock at night.
On Tuesday he still went with his friend to go pick up that car and we got in an argument because it was our last day off together and he had barely seen me or the baby, but he left anyway. I had a dress filtting at 7 o'clock for a wedding I am in and I needed him home by six and he couldn't make it, so i had to ruin my moms plans for dinner and she watched her while I went. So that turned into a fight of course, but we talked about it and I thought it was over, we were even intimate later that night. And off he went to work the next day.

School and marriage

In early March my husband I decided we needed to goet into school and so we went to the college and filled out our financial aid stuff and there lied yet another obstacle, since we were not married and he had filed her on his taxes he was the only one who could claim her, so I was not eligible for any money due to the fact that my father makes decent money. The goverment does not take into account my fathers bills. So on our way out we decided to get married. It was something we always talked about and always planned on doing, so we jumped ahead a little bit and the next week we went and got married.
The morning started off horrible their was a lot of obstacles, but we overcame them and were married.

Uh-oh pregnancy

Then in March of 2006 just over two years after we got together I got really sick. I thought it was the flu but when it lasted over two weeks I decided to take a pregnancy test. Just as I had feared I was pregnant as I come out of the bathroom in tears I tell him. The first thing he does is look up at me and ask me if he is going to have to sell his truck. (What a goof ball) At this point we had only been moved out on our own for less than two months. We moved into the upstairs duplex of his grandmothers house, but it was our own and we painted it and cleaned it all up and we were happy. The pregnancy was very hard with lots of morning sickness and other issues. In late March he was let go from his job due to management changes, so that was very stressful. Then to top it off mid-April I was let go from my employment at U-Haul Moving and Storage due to my inability to pump propane becasue of my pregnancy. So neither one of us was working and it was very hard, but through the whole thing he stood right by me telling me not to worry even as U-Haul is trying to fight my unemployment, and he was right less than two weeks after that he got a full time job. So everything went great, except that my stubborn baby wouldn't drop, so I was induced on November 4 and on November 5 after 13 long hard hours of labor I delivered our beautiful daughter, but that was far from the end of that she was taken from me and moved to a children's hospital because they thought she was having seizures, but four days later we were allowed to take her home and she has been growing and thriving ever since.

My boyfriend

I met my husband almost four years ago through a mutual friend. He had a girlfriend of three years at the time that he was living with. When we met though the chemistry was undeniable. I was working at a sporting good store and he would come in and talk to me every night and after work we would always go out. After a few weeks of this his girlfriend had enough and cleared her stuff out while we were out with another friend. We basically just partied and hung out with all our friends, then on Christmas Eve we went to a party and we were laying in bed together and he kissed me. From then until January 9 we just hung out then he told me he was going to take me to his familys cabin up north and on the way he asked me to be his girlfriend it was all so cute and sweet and when we got up there quite an adventure we had. We couldn't get the heat to work in the cabin, it was -10 outside and we tried to just huddle together, but it was just to cold. So off we went to go home when the car started over heating we couldn't drive more than 45mph and we had to pull over every hour or so to let the car cool off. We were going to take turns driving home, but I fell a sleep and he never woke me up he drove seven hours home in the middle of the night without the radio on just so he wouldn't disturb me, by that point I knew he was an amazing guy.

Me

I am a 21 year old female in Michigan. I love my family I am pretty calm and relaxed now but in the past that has not always held true. I just came out of my wild party days about two years ago and am entirely happy being a mom, a great wife, and going to school. I also work part time at a video store, the job is very boring, but the people I work with are amazing.